With Apologies to Jeff Foxworthy…You Might be a writer if…

Patricia Bradley Writing 9 Comments

Close up on the hands of young woman using computer, tablet and smart phone – business, technology, multitasking concept

This is one of my all-time favorite posts. It first appeared on my blog in April of 2012.

I came to writing rather late in life–at the age of thirty-five. That’s when these people moved into my head and wouldn’t go away until I wrote their stories. And I remember wondering when I could call myself a writer.

Have you ever thought about how writers really know they’re writers? Here are a few of my thoughts on the matter.
You might be a writer…

• If you’re sitting in a family restaurant interviewing a police captain on how murderers get away with their crimes while the diners closest to you edge away…

• If you’re walking down the grocery aisle and people are staring at you and you realize you’ve been working out your latest plotline…out loud…

• If you pray for jury duty so you can research the role…

• If you take pottery lessons for the same reason…

• If this makes sense to you: “I got a request for a proposal from fill in the blank. They want three chapters and a synopsis, and you know how I hate to write a synopsis. And I’m not sure if I want to resolve the romantic conflict or save if for the next book…

• If you keep a notebook by your bed so you can write the brilliant conversations that come to you in the middle of the night…

• If you’ve ever gotten someone to tie your hands behind your back so you can see how long it takes to get loose…

• If you walked around the house blindfolded to see if your other senses really become heightened…

• If you put the time your Aunt Louise tried to shoot the sheriff in your book, disguised of course, and convince yourself that none of the family will read it anyway…

• If someone comes up to you and a writer friend in a restaurant and says, “I heard you talking and finally figured it out—you two must be writers. All that stuff you were talking about couldn’t happen for real. Not in this town…”

• If you get depressed because you can’t keep your character from making a really dumb mistake…

• If you spend more money on writing aids and retreats and conferences than you’ve received for your stories…

If you or any of your friends answered yes to any of these ifs then if you’re not writing, you should be!

Enjoy your Christmas Week!

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  1. Edward Arrington

    I enjoyed these. Once or twice in my life I thought I would like to write a book. However, I don’t recall ever experiencing any of the above. I think anything I would write would fall into the short story category, even though my pastor enjoys picking on me about how much I talk when we get together.

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  2. Sharon Rene

    I definitely relate. Especially to the notebook by the bed. Why do great ideas come bubbling out in the middle of the night. The life of a writer.

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