More Lawyer Gaffes #14 is this week’s Mystery Question. Who would’ve thought there’d be this many!
But first, the photo, taken at Dauphin Island last week. Do you know how hard it is to capture a bird in flight with your phone camera? But I didn’t have my good camera on the beach, so I kept trying, and I love this photo. Our family had a great time at the beach and I used the time to recover from Covid. Still recovering if the fact is known. 🙂
I thought the verse went especially well with the photo. John 14:27 has long been a favorite of mine, one that I cling to when the cares of this world threaten to overcome.
Now for the Mystery Question from two weeks ago–More Funny Lawyer Gaffes #13. As usual, three are true and one is false. Can you guess which one?
- Lawyer: Is it true you identified the defendant in a lineup as one of four men who attacked you?
Witness: Yes.
Defendant: She’s lying! There were only three of us. - Lawyer: How many times have you committed suicide?
Witness: Four times. - Lawyer: And you check your radar unit frequently?
Officer: Yes, I do.
Lawyer: And was your radar unit functioning correctly at the time you had the plaintiff on radar?
Officer: Yes, it was malfunctioning correctly. - Lawyer: Were you alone or by yourself?
And the answer is…#1. Congrats to all who guessed correctly.
Now for this week’s Mystery Question–More Funny Lawyer Gaffes #14. As usual, three are true and one is false. Can you guess which one?
- ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse, or blood pressure or breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. - ATTORNEY briefing his client: “You must swear to tell the complete truth. Do you understand?”
CLIENT: “I do.”
ATTORNEY: “Do you know what will happen if you don’t tell the truth?”
CLIENT: “Sure. I imagine that our side will win.” - ATTORNEY: Now sir, I’m sure you are an intelligent and honest man–
WITNESS: Thank you. If I weren’t under oath, I’d return the compliment. - ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And the man was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
Okay, Super Sleuths, which one did I make up? Leave your answers in the Comments, and I’ll enter you in a drawing for a book from my library.
Here’s a group I’ve discovered this week that I think you’ll enjoy–Southern Raised.
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Comments 7
Guessing #3
I’m going with #3.
#2
I’m so glad you got to enjoy time with family. There’s nothing better! Trust you’ll continue to rebound from Covid quickly.
These Lawyer Gaffes are so funny! I’m going to guess #2.
#3
I am going with #2. Love the picture and verse. Praying that you will continue to recover from Covid.
Pat, I’m glad you had a great time with your family. I’m praying that your COVID recovery will soon be complete. And, what a photo! I’m glad you persisted and snagged that one. So cool. Good verse to pair with it, too.
Let’s see…
#1. No way would I get that lawyer.
#2. Sounds like a personal conversation.
#3. Pretty snarky comment.
#4. I don’t think I’d want this one for my lawyer either.
Because the conversation was between client and lawyer, I’d say you made up #2.
I love that song, too!