More Crazy Lawyer Gaffes #8 is this week’s Mystery Question…if I can think up a gaffe that a lawyer hasn’t said. 😉 I’ve been busy getting in my edits for On the Edge of Trust! PTL, they are done…at least this go-round. Now for the photo and verse.
Delores Topliff contributed this week’s photo, taken when she traveled to Jacksonville, Florida. Thank you! I love the crane and the waves! The verse in Psalms immediately came to mind.
Now for this week’s Mystery Question–More Funny Lawyer Gaffes #7. As usual, three are true and one is false. Can you guess which one?
- Accused, acting as his own counsel: “Did you get a good look at my face when I stole your car?”
- The Court: “Now, as we begin, I must ask you to banish all present information and prejudice from your minds, if you have any.”
- Q: “Did he pick the dog up by the ears?”
A: “No.”
Q: “What was he doing with the dog’s ears?”
A: “Picking them up in the air.”
Q: “Where was the dog at this time?”
A: “Attached to the ears.” - Lawyer: “When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?”
Other Lawyer: “Objection. That question should be taken out and shot.”
And the answer is…#1. Reminder–never act as your own counsel. And I noticed I spelled the word counsel wrong–that should’ve been a clue… 🙂
Now for this week’s Mystery Question–More Funny Lawyer Gaffes #8. As usual, three are true and one is false. Can you guess which one?
- Lawyer: “Can you tell us what was stolen from your house?”
Witness: “There was a rifle that belonged to my father that was stolen from the hall closet.”
Lawyer: “Can you identify the rifle?”
Witness: “Yes. There was something written on the side of it.”
Lawyer: “And what did the writing say?”
Witness: “‘Winchester’!” - Lawyer: “And you testified you were shot in the woods?”
WITNESS: “No, I said I was shot in the lumbar region.” - Lawyer: “Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?”
Witness: “No. He was wearing a mask.”
Lawyer: “What was he wearing under the mask?”
Witness: “Er…his face.” - Lawyer: “Did you blow your horn or anything?”
Witness: “After the accident?”
Lawyer: “Before the accident.”
Witness: “Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.”
Okay, Super Sleuths, which one did I make up? Leave your answer in the comments, and I’ll enter you in a drawing for a copy of Shattered Sanctuary by Nancy Mehl.
I hope you enjoy this toe-tapping song from a young Ricky Scaggs.
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Comments 29
#4
Author
Hi Charlotte! We’ll see next week!
I agree, #4 – too funny.
Author
I’m glad I made you laugh, Mary. 😉 We’ll see next week…
I’m going with number 4.
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We’ll see, Jean. 🙂
Love the picture and the verse. You keep finding fabulous old music videos. This week I’m going with number 3 because I couldn’t even figure out how a lawyer would think someone would wear something UNDER a mask.
Author
Love your logic, Priscilla. And I’m glad you enjoyed the music.
#2
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We’ll see, Linda…
1
Author
We’ll see, BN!
I am going with 4.
Author
Hi Sharan. We’ll see next week…
These are hysterical but I’ll go with #4. Keep it up!
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I’m gad you like them, Delores…we’ll see next week if it’s #4…
#4
Author
We’l see, Caryl!
Great photo, Delores! I love the ocean, and the crane really looks good there. Again, a well chosen verse, Pat.
When we lived in Zurich, there was standing joke. What’s the Swiss national bird? The construction crane, of course! 🙂
#1. Winchester, yeah that will pin it down.
#2. That would be the lumbar region of an old growth forest.
#3. I think the mask was a cover-up.
#4. There’s always a critic.
Actually Pat, I don’t think you made up any of them. We are talking lawyers, right? I’ll say #2 just for grins.
Speaking of lawyers, I just read a smashing book involving lawyers. Cara Putman has an absolute winner with “The Accused”.
Author
Love the construction crane, Tim! And your logic…we’ll see how well it works next week! And The Accused is on my radar.
Fabulous photo, Delores! Love the crane! Pat, you selected the perfect verse.
Going with #2 ha!
Author
Thank you, Barbara! We’ll see if it’s #2 next week. And Delores said she thought that was an egret…I need to look it up.
I am guessing #1 this week.
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Hi Gloria! We’ll see…
#4
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We’ll see, Barbie D. 🙂
I’m going with #1 again.
Author
Hi Joy…we’ll see!
Love your photo Delores! Thanks for sharing.
Pat, congrats on completing this round of edits! I look forward to reading this book.
All of these gaffes are really good or really bad – I’m not sure which, but they did make me laugh.
Toss-up between 2 & 4 – I’ll with the majority and guess #4